Desert Bagel: Time to Pretend

Internet ephemera from the tennis world and beyond. Have something you want to include? Join the Discord  – we have a really nice and active community growing there – or hmu on Bluesky.

• Previously on The Bagel: "Siri, reluctantly play Katy Perry."
• It was a bit of a wacky Monday out here at the Indian Wells Tennis Garden. Taylor Fritz (l. Michelsen), Alex De Minaur (l. Norrie), Madison Keys (l. Kartal) and Alexander Bublik (l. Hijikata) all bowed out.

• And the defending women's champion Mirra Andreeva crashed out in rather cinematic fashion:

• Look, I don't understand what was going on in Andreeva's head when she walked off court and seemingly yelled "Fuck you all" at the crowd. Yes, the crowd wasn't exactly all that supportive of her in the late stages of her 6-4, 6-7, 6-3 loss to Katerina Siniakova in the third round. The crowds out here – as nearly everywhere – always love an underdog, and the 18-year-old Andreeva wasn't exactly helping her cause with the petulant behavior that has become the norm in her losing efforts over the last year.

• She was throwing her racquet, yelling at her box, gesticulating angrily, and it was just uncomfortable to watch. All you need to know is that Andreeva's behavior made the usually equally hot-headed Siniakova look like this:

• Andreeva is still only 18. She was carrying a load of self-imposed (probably) pressure as a back-to-back defending champion in Dubai and Indian Wells. She virtually disappeared after that historic run last year, so her ranking is going to take a tumble. She'll leave no better than No.10 and could fall further depending on other players' results. And with Victoria Mboko still in the tournament, Andreeva will no longer be the highest-ranked teenager on tour. It's a small thing, but it's a bit of salt in the would for someone who was once not just at the head of the class, but the ONLY ONE in the class.
• But.
• I have a lot of grace – and would argue vociferously that everyone should give grace – to players who crash out during matches. Heck, we should all be extending more grace even outside of matches. Aren't we completely starved of this type of stuff in this sport??? We shouldn't want to tamper it down!
• But.

• Personally, I might have to draw the line at cursing out an adverse crowd that wasn't overtly rude. And as a French colleague pointed out to me as we were talking about it on press row, "She did this two years ago and she is now two years older." As they say, touchè.

• But.
• 18 is still 18. We let tennis players get away with a lot in this sport – though there's no arguing that SOME players get away with a lot more than OTHER players for REASONS – and if she truly recognizes this is bad, not just for her personally but also for The Brand, maybe change is a comin'.
• Here's what Mirra said in her press conference after the match. It might have helped that she came in hours later after finishing her day on a happy note, winning her doubles match with Vicky Mboko:

Q. As you left the court, you probably know what I'm talking about, looked like you were kind of swearing in the direction of, was it supporters, your team? What happened from your perspective?

MIRRA ANDREEVA: Well, of course I can say that there were a lot of emotions that I was going through after the loss. But of course I'm not really proud of how I managed it. I'm not really proud of how I handled it in the end.

Those are the things that really need to work on soon. I don't know. Not in the future but whenever I get the chance.

Yeah, I hope that I can work on it and I get better in that, as well.

Q. Was it at the crowd?

MIRRA ANDREEVA: It was to myself, to everyone, basically. I mean, after the loss, I just get very angry, so I say those things sometimes to myself. I mean, first to myself, of course, but then, yeah, it was just anger coming out, just a lot of emotions. Not really towards anyone.

• Another colleague on press row also referenced shades of Martina Hingis in how Andreeva was behaving on court. So...

Q. Players often have role models for how they play, but do you also have role models in tennis where you think they have such good temperament, you like how they handle their losses? Is there another player, a retired player, you look to for a model?

MIRRA ANDREEVA: In terms of game style, I think one of my idols is Martina Hingis. I really love her as a person and as a player as well.

I was actually thinking about it recently. I think the one person that was handling losses very well was Serena Williams, like I've never heard or seen her upset or even I remember, like, she was losing finals on the Slams, and she would always smile and be happy for her opponent that she won the match and she got the trophy.

So maybe it's something that I can also try to learn, and yeah, we'll see how that's gonna go. Yeah, we'll see.

• Serena was great at putting on a brave face in public but believe me...behind the scenes, SHE WAS UPSET. And that's FINE. That's what fueled her greatness.

• Just...please don't cuss out the crowd, Mirra. Nothing good will come from it. At most, you can wag a finger. But also...you kinda gotta earn that wag.

Julie Foudy calls out ‘lack of respect’ broadcasters give women’s sports

TNT Sports soccer analyst Julie Foudy called out the “lack of respect” broadcasters give women’s sports after Saturday’s SheBelieves Cup.

Awful AnnouncingDrew Lerner

• Venus Williams is in the Indian Wells mixed doubles draw. (Desert Sun via Yahoo)

• This was a pretty wild moment: Things got awkward between Chris Eubanks and CoCo Vandeweghe during a Tennis Channel hit. The prevailing opinion seems to be that it wasn't a bit. (Awful Announcing)
• Dan Kaplan reports that the PTPA has amended its antitrust lawsuit to remove "Reilly Opelka and Sorana Cîrstea as class representatives and add Christian Harrison, Ingrid Neel, and Marco Trungelliti as class representatives." (Substack)
• Raise your hand if you watched THE MENU and couldn't shake the Noma vibes. (NY Times, h/t Discord Tony)

• This is an issue everywhere, but I've finally had enough of this in tennis: STOP CALLING THE WOMEN "FEMALES". It's a massive red flag of many, many things that you do not want us thinking about you. Please stop doing it. (Jezebel)

Stop Calling Women “Females” | The Daily Nexus

Kenneth Moody discusses the outdated and sexist origins of the term “female.”

The Daily Nexus | The University of California, Santa Barbara's independent, student-run newspaper.Kenneth Moody

• I'm writing this up about mid-day Tuesday, which means I've done so while watching Aryna Sabalenka dispatch Naomi Osaka 6-2, 6-4. Aryna is looking sharp as usual and will play Victoria Mboko next. Naomi did well to keep the scoreboard pressure on in the second set. After the match, Naomi said she she had fun, which is good to hear.

Q. In terms of facing her for the first time in a very long time, did it just feel like playing her for the first time? Was it what you expected, I guess, the ball coming off her racquet, the manner in which she was playing?

NAOMI OSAKA: No, it definitely felt like playing her for the first time. I think, like, obviously I could watch her on TV or whatever, but in reality, it's very different.

I also feel like I was a little, like, flat-footed sometimes, because I expected the ball to be coming harder but then it didn't. She grunts the same way for every ball. I was, like, Oh, my God, she tricked me (smiling).

No, it was a cool learning experience. I know we haven't played for a long time, so I hope that we can play again sometime soon.

• The look on Naomi's face when Charlie Eccleshare of The Athletic read this quote back to her was very amusing:

Q. Does it make any difference when it's someone, like she used to be with your agency. You must have known her. Does that make any difference, playing someone...

ARYNA SABALENKA: Not at all. I just feel sorry for her that she moved from Evolve back to IMG. I don't think that's a smart decision to do.

I'm happy, I'm super happy that now all time that they were kind of like, how you say, balancing between me and the Naomi, now I got most of the time. I'm happy with that (smiling).

• This was Naomi's very classy response:

Q. It's only a few months in, but are you pleased with that decision to move from your old agency to IMG? I ask, because Aryna said, I feel sorry for her that she moved back. I think it may have been said probably as a joke.

NAOMI OSAKA: Was she laughing when she said it (smiling)?

Look, we're two different people, like, for sure. I think her experiences aren't the same as mine, and I wouldn't have it any other way, you know.

For me, I have always loved IMG. I have been treated really well there, and the people there are really kind to me. I would recommend to IMG to people. I guess she wouldn't. But, yeah, I think we just have two very different experiences at two different places.

• Daria Kasatkina has withdrawn from Miami and says she needs more time to heal the tendon injury that she suffered in Dubai that ruled her out of the Sunshine Double. She says in WHAT THE VLOG that it's more serious than they initially thought.

• Iga Swiatek avenged her Doha loss to Maria Sakkari and the win set up a fun one with Karolina Muchova in the Round of 16. Here's how Iga described Karolina in her press conference: "Honestly, I love playing against her. I also love watching Karolina. Yeah, it's just nice to see someone who plays so smart and so smooth. She's like woman's Roger."

• Everyone has their favorite racquet smash style: One swift strike? Multiple hatchet whacks? One smash and then a dismantling once you get to your chair? But mine will always be the knee snap. It's so badass and the best to do it was Stan Wawrinka:

• H/t Discord Harlan: In Search of Dark Breakfast. This is why I love blogs. More blogs. (Ryan Moulton's Articles)
• H/T Discord Carrie: There is an Arthur Ashe exhibition running through June at the Black History Museum in Virginia and it looks amazing. (Black History Museum)

Bop of the Day: KPOP DEMON HUNTERS' "Golden" will probably win best song, but damn if THIS wasn't THE musical moment of the year. My absolute favorite scene from SINNERS: